Investment in Stellar Cannacoin can be many different things to make the seed grow. I'm not screaming "Buy the dip!". IMO anything right now is a great entry. I'm saying invest:

1. STASHAPP IOS / ANDROID Wallet with CANNACOIN TRUSTLINE: All of us here have an amount in our Tip Bot so why not park some in your wallet, just add the trustline first BEFORE sending from reddit. As we become more popular u/Canna_Tips gets a little distracted and fails occasionally. If your wallet is established, try, try again.
2. Liquidity Pool: Again kinda obvious.. and now totally user friendly in StashApp (StashApp Walk Thru up to ver 1.4 android).. this will lessen the price swings and give new money more reassurance in the project. Currently paying 6.9% APY. HUGE HELP TO STABILITY.

3. Spread the word: Not everyone is into crypto and not everyone in crypto is in to weed.. so be considerate. I cannot emphasize this enough. EVERY smoke session or Feature/partnership should be should to the world. If we all do it a few times with each post, the fire will spread. Be courteous of sub or platform rules but this is something everyone who holds, should be doing. Its even easier with StashApp PACKETS

CREATING CANNACOIN PACKETS
Tell Cannabis related industry about Stellar Cannacoin, where we are, and where we plan to go! Dispensaries, head shops, etsy sellers, delivery services, cbd, Hemp... the list goes on. Talk about Cannacoin.. make Stellar Cannacoin the Kleenex or Coke of the Cannabis Crypto world. Why shouldn't it be.
Toke on!
cReePy

I know that sounds insane, but there are pirates out there, posing as riders and/or Workers I was on a train that was robbed two years ago and witnessed one get robbed last year, the first one was in Texas and I was riding a well and the train sided in Pacos for a CC, 6 or 7 white trucks with spotlights pulled up to the car we where on,I thought I was getting pulled off, but nope,they climbed on the well adjacent to mine and popped the door to the can on top(my well didn't have the door facing me on top, just the bottom one, which cannot be opened) and started unloading giant boxes of shit with a quickness I never seen, about 10 people standing side by side wearing ski mask passing down box after box of shit to the bed of a truck, one truck was parked facing the car with a spotlight, the other was parked it the bed right up to the car, they loaded the bed of that truck with boxes from the can, and than the truck pulled away and another back up in its place, and they loaded that one, they emptied the entire can in less than a minute and than all jumped into a bed of a truck abd drove off to another car, my heart was racing, I prayed to whatever it is that we don't get killed..at the time I couldn't comprehend wtf was happening, even tho it was very obvious, I saw one person standing by the truck park facing the car with an AR15 rifle(at least it appeared to be) before they drove off..anyways they train left and we rode to Sweetwater and got off the train, and there where about 10 cans wide open and empty and a few UPs pigs, probably more, scared the shit out of me, I don't think these where workers..the other time was in Rawlins, and an IM pulled up and stopped for fuel and CC going to Denver, I saw someone on the train, they looked like a rider, but where wearing a bandanna like mask and had bikes, the other was unload the piggy and throwing boxes into a pile next to the car , than they got off and went down to the next can and did the same, and hit a few more, knew they where not riders at all, than the train left and they where a bit aways from where they started, I saw a van pull up and they loaded the loot into it and drove tf off, I don't give a shit enough to report them, unless their intentions mainly where to harm people, I think they wanted to rob the train, however wouldn't doubt if they harmed someone if said person got in their way, I assumed they got on the train in Green River, because they where on a well adjacent to the pig they hit, I guess they waited until it stopped? Idk why they choose Rawlins instead of Green River, ether way, both times where some shit, especially the one in Texas, I have a feeling if they seen me, I wouldn't be alive typing this right now..I gues this is why Bulls exist? These aholes make it hot for riders, because the 2nd ones appeared as riders, but weren't.. anyone have any experience with Train Pirates? Think the company hires then to rob their trains for insurance money?? Thanks for reading this and as a Hobo or rider, we NEVER touch any thing that isn't ours, I mean yea you get your Oogle, but this was organized as hell...

I'm a Marwadi guy (25) and I've been dating a Bengali woman (23), both of us living in Kolkata. We've been together for almost half a year and things just really clicked.
Recently we started talking about potentially wanting to spend our lives together and that's when the topic of marriage sparked up and we started discussing the sort of problems that might come up since it's an inter-community marriage.
Being a Marwadi, everyone in my family is a vegetarian but having grown up with Bengali friends all my life and my family definitely has a problem with non-veg food and even people who consume it. I could see a lot of similar differences which exist between the two communities and my parents would definitely have a hard time digesting the fact that I want to do this.
But at the end of the day, I do want this to work out and am ready to face what's coming. I wanted to hear out from Redditors here if they have a similar story of inter-community marriages and how things panned out to be for you guys. Might help me calm my nerves.

My wife(Sara) and I had been happily married for 8 years, no kids, no fights, and we have a great sex life. My neighbor(Bill) and his wife moved in across the street 3 years ago and the four of us got along pretty well.
During Covid, we did a lot of online shopping and I installed a Porch Pirate camera with a motion detector that sends me alerts while I'm at work. Yesterday I got a call from the groomer that our dog was ready to pick up and I called my wife at work to see which one of us needed to pick up the dog. Her office said that she had gone home sick at lunch, so I called her to check on her to see if she was alright but she didn't answer. About thirty minutes later the Porch camera sent me an alert and a video showing my neighbor at my door and my wife opening the door in an expensive lingerie set I bought her for Valentine's Day. I worked a lot from home during Covid and have a Remote Desktop on my personal laptop so I can access files and things from my office computer. So I ported into my laptop that was set up at a desk in our bedroom and accessed the camera. When they walked into the bedroom and she started helping him off with his clothes my heart began to pound. With full audio, I watched them make out and eventually have sex first in Missionary and then Sara got on top of him as it's easier for her to finish that way. At that point, I unmuted my work computer and turned the camera on, and said, What the hell do you two think you're doing? Needless to say, that ruined the mood.
They both turned and saw me on the screen, I told Bill that he had three seconds to get out of my house before I sent screenshots to his wife and he got out of there as fast as he could. My wife started crying and I said we would talk when I got home. I left work and drove home, when I got there she was in the shower. I saw her phone lying on the table and I picked it up and opened it up and read a couple of disturbing texts. I didn't have much time as I heard the shower quit so I changed the lock code on her phone so she couldn't erase the evidence before I had a chance to save it. She came in the living room and saw me holding her phone and the color drained from her face. She started to try and get me to listen to her but I shut her down. I turned on the TV and streamed their sex video on the tv, with sound. I asked her what part of that she wanted to explain. She had tears running down her face and she couldn't look me in the eye, I told her she needed to pack a bag and stay at her parent's house until we could sort this out. She wanted to stay and talk but I said this was really raw right now and things would get said that couldn't be taken back. She packed a bag and asked me to call her soon so we could deal with this.
She called on her mom's phone and said her phone was locked and she couldn't use it. I explained I had read a couple of conversations she had with Bill but I didn't have time to read them all so I changed her unlock code so she couldn't purge those messages. She got mad and started to yell so I sent a picture to her mom's phone, it was a great angle showing both of their faces. She got quiet and her voice was breaking really bad saying I couldn't show her family those photos. Her dad is a deacon at his church and they are very religious, Sara even teaches Sunday school to fill in sometimes. I told her that we would talk in the morning and hung up. I called my lawyer and told him what happened and told him to draw up separation and divorce papers. He gave some advice on how to proceed and said she would be served the separation papers tomorrow but the divorce papers would take a few days. I canceled all the credit cards and transferred half of our cash to an account she didn't have access to per the lawyer's advice. I was able to get a locksmith out that day and changed all the locks and the garage and security codes. Then I had a phone conversation with Bill's wife. She said that he was acting all weird when she got home and I explained why and I sent her a couple of screenshots and told her if she wanted it I had it all on video as well. She was livid and I almost worry about his safety when he gets home.
Today my wife showed up at 7:00 only to find her key didn't work. I let her in and I asked for her phone which she argued a bit before handing it over. It took about twenty minutes with her watching as I went through her phone and forwarded the texts I wanted to save to my phone and I handed it back to her. She looked at it for a minute and then at me, she had about twenty texts from her friends wanting to know what happened. I had sent out a couple of group texts to our friends canceling all of our plans and explained I had come home and caught my wife having sex with my neighbor in our bed. She couldn't believe I had outed her to all our friends and how it looked like I had no desire to work things out, and she went on for over an hour about how sorry she was and that we could get past this and go forward. I told her that there was no way I could ever trust her again and that the love I had for her was burnt to ashes as I watched her screw our neighbor in our bed. I told her to pack whatever clothes she could in a suitcase and she could come for the rest of them Saturday.
This afternoon a couple of her girlfriends reached out to me, one telling me that my wife still loved me and we should try and work it out, the other one saying I shouldn't throw our marriage out and that I might be partially to blame. I answered them by sending a screenshot to each of them but I got no response. The rest of our friends have reached out to console me and offer their support. Several of them said they were blocking Sara's number. Saturday, when she comes for her things I will tell her I filed for divorce and we can end this civilly or if she wants to fight it and get ugly I will make sure her whole family and the Youth Minister at her dad's church get a copy of the video.
I'm sorry for this long story, it has been therapeutic to put this all down. I'm still seeing red right now but I know in a day or two it's going to knock the wind out of me. After rereading what I wrote, should I listen to her side of the story as to what brought this on? If for no other reason than to maybe get some closure?
​
**TL;DR; : I caught my wife having sex with my neighbor on video**

Robert Wright points it out as he dismantles Harris' argument in Wired. Here's an excerpt: "Believing that the root of terrorism is religion requires ruling out other root causes, so Harris set about doing that. In his book he listed such posited causes as “the Israeli occupation of the West Bank and Gaza…the collusion of Western powers with corrupt dictatorships…the endemic poverty and lack of economic opportunity that now plague the Arab world.”
Then he dismissed them. He wrote that “we can ignore all of these things—or treat them only to place them safely on the shelf—because the world is filled with poor, uneducated, and exploited peoples who do not commit acts of terrorism, indeed who would never commit terrorism of the sort that has become so commonplace among Muslims.”
If you’re tempted to find this argument persuasive, I recommend that you first take a look at a different instance of the same logic. Suppose I said, “We can ignore the claim that smoking causes lung cancer because the world is full of people who smoke and don’t get lung cancer.” You’d spot the fallacy right away: Maybe smoking causes lung cancer under some circumstances but not others; maybe there are multiple causal factors—all necessary, but none sufficient—that, when they coincide, exert decisive causal force.
Or, to put Harris’s fallacy in a form that he would definitely recognize: Religion can’t be a cause of terrorism, because the world is full of religious people who aren’t terrorists.
Harris isn’t stupid. So when he commits a logical error this glaring—and when he rests a good chunk of his world view on the error—it’s hard to escape the conclusion that something has biased his cognition."
from https://www.wired.com/story/sam-harris-and-the-myth-of-perfectly-rational-thought/

So, a bit of context, i live in mexico and we practice Catholicism (for those who didn't know), we have these rituals called "la primera comunión" (first communion) and "la confirmación"(confirmation) which every catholic has to go through at some point of their lives after several semesters of "catesismo" (bible study), usually people have to first get the first communion before being able to do the confirmation, if everything goes well, the person would have completed their confirmation at somewhere around 10 years old, the only problem is, i was around 14 yo AND an atheist (at this age i was just coming out to my family, but it's been a while since my doubts), my family wanted me so badly to do the first communion and were even pressuring me a bit because i was already way behind(i hadn't had my confirmation due to a LOT of moving out and other shenanigans), but, i refused, they where rather surprised and started trying to convince me on doing it, after a few months of back and fort they told me that my uncle (the favourite of my uncles) have never been someone else's godfather (yes, we have a godfather and godmother in every event) and that he wished to be someone's godfather so much, so, i finally accepted, really just to please him, to be honest i now see that it was just a dirty trick because my uncle took it very lightly, like "cool" level lightly, anyway, i'm getting off track.
We started preparing everything that i needed for the ceremony, the suit, flowers, a bible, a place where to hold the event, between other things, one of those were to "confess", so we went to a big historical church on my town (we have lots of historical buildings from the spanish colonization and they are pretty impressive), my parents told me to go in and confess myself to the priest, so i did, i went in there, i met with the priest and he took me to a backroom with two chairs, he sat me down and asked me to confess my "sins", and i let it out, it went something like this(mind that this was about 8 years ago and my memory is a bit fuzzy). The priest, with a calm and cordial tone began "so, tell me, what's wrong? what have you done?", which i replied with " I haven't really don't anything, i am just here because my parents told me to", the priest looked a little confused and asked "So, why would they tell you to come here if you have done nothing? you must have done something?", i again talked and said "No, not really, you see, i am doing my first communion soon and i was told that i needed to come here", the priest, now even more confused asked "why are you getting your first communion this late?" (mind that i look way younger that my age, but it was still way too late for a kid to get the first communion, which was strange to see around these parts), i spoke, now a bit nervous "well, i don't really believe in god and" he cut me off with and somewhat angry shout "what? you don't believe?" i was allowed to continue as he stared me down with an angry stare "well, no, i've doubted for a while, and i don't really believe that there is a god" The priest at this point was RED, he looked like he wanted to rip my throat out and then he just went off "Do you think that this is a game? huh!? how dare you set foot in my church if you don't even believe" he raises his hand, at the moment i kind of felt that it was an incoming strike, but instead he aggressively pointed away "GET OUT, AND DON'T COME BACK UNTIL YOU TRULLY BELIEVE", then i got up and kind jogged/nervously walked outside the room, and closed the heavy old wooden door on my way out, then i just kinda chickened outside the church, i was both scared and... how do i put it... i know! "I cant believe i just did that that was crazy hs", yes, i felt those both things... and i also felt a little bit bad. Anyway, i came back to the car after i switched the look of fear on my face into a fake smile, my parents asked me "how was it" and i told them "oh, the priest kicked me out", both of my parents' jaws dropped, their faces went red (with both anger and embarrassment i believe) and they said "WHAT???", so i repeated "yea, he kicked me out during the confession", they asked with anger "what did you say to him?!", which i replied with "the truth", they knew exactly what i was talking about, we stayed parked while they figured what to do next while scolding me from time to time, after a while they took me to the house of a friend of theirs who was also a priest and told me to go "confess" again, but this time to leave that stuff untouched, so i went in there, he asked me what did i do, i told him nothing, and he was like "eh, good enough", we sat there for a few minutes talking about something, i think it was cars and sports (well, he was talking, i was nodding), then i went back and told my parents that i did it, after that i went to an even filled with 6 year olds, i got my first communion, a free suit, and the best of it all, the respect of my whole family, now nobody questions my believes and/or tries to force me into ceremonies of that nature, not even my grandmother, and she is an extreme believer, so, i'm pretty darn happy with how it went... though i still feel bad about the priest, i feel like he got caught in between the crossfire, he was just doing his job i guess.

I am not Bal Gangadhar Tilak, that savant of plate tectonics who formulated a Unified Field Theory of India when he reconciled the … oh let’s call it … fact of India being the birthplace of humanity with the equally muscular fact of only cold places producing intelligence by his earth-shattering (literally) discovery that India as a whole moved up to the North Pole where Manu was placed on it, and then made a return journey to the tropics and thus was born the greatest civilization the world will ever know.
I am not one of the great thinkers this land seems to be producing at an ever-accelerating pace, who have been able to decipher that Christianity is basically Krishna-neeti (Krishna’s policy) and Kaaba (Mecca) is a Hindu temple, and how India invented nuclear weapons (and called them Brahmastra) and diplomacy (krisna-neeting it Chanakya neeti). With these twain weapons shall India destroy and isolate Pakistan!
Hell, I am not even Narendra Damodar Das Modi, who cut through the fog of Chinese herbal teas and PM2.5 to ascertain that genetic science and plastic surgery was born in Ancient India as well, proof being the in vitro birth of Karan in Mahabharat and the replacement of the human head of Lord Ganesh with an elephant head, respectively.
No, sadly, I am a mere mleccha from a cold place and while that might give the Gangadhar a headache (Can I be intelligent?), it means I can only aspire to the lofty high these visionaries have attained.
So I dare not present grand facts about huge things. I will only make a tiny proposal about a small place.
Kashmir has been an eyesore on India’s body politic for the last 72 years. The average life expectancy in India is only 68.5 years, so there is a danger the eyesore might become congenital. The latest attack on Indian armed forces at Lithpur in District Pulwoam, where a Kashmiri suicide bomber killed more than forty Indian soldiers, can become India’s “enough is enough” moment. While randomly beating and harassing Kashmiris working or studying in various parts of Bharat is a good beginning, it won’t be enough. After all, if killing more than 80,000 Kashmiris and making about 10,000 of them disappear has not taught them a lesson, what will a few beatings achieve? No, India needs to do more.
This is my cue. Hear me out.
What are the various dimensions of the Kashmir problem?
Well, first of all, there is Pakistan, that bloody old Mamlikat-e-Khudadaad (I don’t even know what that means). They have been brainwashing Kashmiris from across the border while India, which holds the territory through its 700,000 soldiers and an iron-clad administration, has failed to convince Kashmiris about the merits of living in the World’s Largest Democracy. Unfortunately, brainwashing was not invented in Ancient India. Pakistan needs to be made to understand that its wishy-washy attempts to wash away India from Kashmir by brainwashing Kashmiris are mere pipe dreams.
Then there are these ungrateful Kashmiris themselves. I mean how many free and fair elections does India need to conduct in the state for Kashmiris to understand how much it loves them? Do the Kashmiris even realize what a logistic nightmare it is to muzzle every independent voice and put a soldier on every inch of the troubled land before every election so that its freeness and fairness is not called into question? Granted that India has made mistakes in Kashmir in the past; but if Kashmiris can’t forgive India, maybe India needs to find a new way to make its point.
Finally, what about Kashmiri Pandits? Kashmir was their land. It was a Hindu land. According to a Hindu myth, it was satisar, a great lake extending from Vearnag in the southeast to Varmul in the northwest, populated only by Jaludbhav, a rakshas (demon) who had been given the boon of immortality by Brahma himself, as long as he stayed in the water. Then the Pandits came from the banks of Saraswati in Haryana to settle on the banks of the lake (they loved their fish, still do). But Jaludbhav would gobble anyone who went near the lake. So they pleaded with Vishnu to rid them of the demon, and he sent Kashyap Rishi to drain the lake, leaving Jaludbhav vulnerable to Vishnu’s Sudharshan Chakra. Later, the mleccha came and polluted this holy land with their azaans and beef-eating. The holy land needs to be purified and restored to its formal liquid glory.
What if I tell you that my solution will take care of all these dimensions? Talk about single-window clearance! Am I a Modi Bhakt or what?
Ok, so here it goes. India needs to detonate a single thermonuclear device near Uri. Call it Surgical Strike 3.0. Since Uri means “the udder of a cow”, the strike can also be called Gau Raksha 1.0. Whatever the name, it will seal the narrow passage the Jhelum uses to sneak out of Indian-controlled Kashmir into Azad Kashmir. The result: Infiltration of water across the Line of Control will stop. Kashmir’s water will stay in the valley, slowly submerging towns and villages starting from Varmul, Sopore and Bandepur, then Srinagar and Ganderbal, then Pulwoam, Kopwoar, Badgoam, Koalgoam, Shopian, and Islambad, right upto Vearnag. Kashmir will become satisar, in the great Indian tradition of first inventing a legend and then creating it in reality. Kashmiris who are able to swim to safety can then be relocated to various manageable-sized colonies across India or given the option of going to Pakistan.
Varmul is at a height of 1,600 m above the sea level; Vearnag, at 1,850 m; the Baanhaal pass, at 2,832 m; Peer ki Galli, at 3,485 m; Zojila, at 3,485; and Sinthan, at 3,792. So, even after the blast, the blocked passageway, at about 2,600 m, will continue to be the lowest point of exit for the accumulating water. The volume of water that the bowl-shaped vale will be able to retain can be calculated from the formula for shallow domes, as follows:

Surface area of the Kashmir valley = 16,000 km2
Highest point = 2.6 km above sea level (Uri post-Gau Raksha 1.0)
Lowest point = 1.6 km above sea level (Varmul)
Therefore, height (h) of the spherical section = 1 km
Area of a spherical cap = 2 π r h. Here, area = 16,000 km2 and h = 1 km.
Therefore, r = 2,548 km
Volume will be π h2 (3 r – h) / 3; in our case, h = 1 km and r = 2,548 km.
Therefore, the volume of water in satisar will be = 8,000 km3 (approximately) or about 512 billion m3.

The ballpark figure of the flow of Jhelum’s water at Uri is around 4,000 m3 per second, so it will take about 128,000,000 seconds to fill up the satisar. This amounts to about 1,480 days. while that might be enough time to make Pakistan forget Karbala, india does not need to take any chances. So the strategic nuclear blast will have to be combined with the construction of a giant water wheel at the Baanhaal pass to ferry the water, once the satisar fills up, across the Pir Panjal Range and into the River Chenab, from where it can be sent to East Punjab through a network of canals starting at Reasi. It will ensure that Pakistan does not receive a drop of the water flowing in Jhelum and Chenab.
A similar Patisar (“pati” in Kashmir means “backyard” or “behind”) can be created in Ladakh, and its water ferried over the Zojila pass into satisar, from where it can then be transported to the Chenab by the aforementioned channels, or sold to China at a discounted price. In this manner, Pakistan will lose the water of Indus as well.
Thus, all the three goals will be achieved. Kashmir will become India’s forever and ever. Tourism will bloom as more space becomes available for houseboats and shikara rides. There will be an abundant supply of fish as well. The two giant water wheels at Zojila and Baanhal will be among the chief tourist attractions and can also be repurposed or diversified as Ferris wheels. Two, all of Pakistan’s rivers will run dry, its people will die of thirst, and it will have no water with which to brainwash Kashmiris. The icing on the cake will be the fact of Kashmir becoming satisar, the wet dream of so many visionaries.

The writer claims to be a direct descendant of Jaludbhav
https://raiot.in/a-modest-proposal-to-solve-the-kashmir-problem/

Tonight has been worse than usual . It all started about a sock of his around 6 pm. He said all his socks were going missing as he found one behind the bed . We started arguing and of course his usual berating of calling me dumb bitches and telling me how horrible of a woman I am . I went and put ny headphones in and just hung out until I cooked dinner . Around 8 I cane into the room with my tacos in hand and answered a call from my cousin telling me that I should g too San Diego with her . I was super excited and let out a little scream . He popped up and grabbed his headphones and called me a bitch . So I asked why he did that . What the big issue is. I started with him tonight . I’m so tired . Of always being the one wrong . I asked him why .he started yelling and telling me to shut the hell up nagging him about him calling me out my name . So I started telling him I don’t have to . As the argument got worse he got more angry . He told me he would flip everything over in the room . As we continued screaming he came over to my side if the bed and slapped me across my face . After slapping me I stood up and told him to stop. He grabbed some by the side of my head and started slapping me, grabbing me, and punching me . We kept arguing ad of course I start crying . I’ve been crying nonstop since 8 . After he calmed down while sitting in the edge of the bed I poured myself a drink and kept crying . He told me to get over it . Sparking more argument . He told me to get over it . That upset me so I kept crying I went into the dark bathroom to cry . To let it out . When I came back he was even more mad again . The berating started all over again . He’s calling me stupid bitches and telling me that that was his way of trying o make it better and that I alway reject him making things right . I mtired you guys . I really am. I put all my money into this house so I can’t afford to leave . I wish I could leave encijd it was for 1 night .

TL;DR: the medical supplies we talk about are good for more than a shootout. Have them on hand all the time.
This sub focuses a lot on what medical you’re running, where do you keep it on your kit, getting training for things like GSWs, but I just wanted to remind everyone that guns aren’t the only way people get hurt. I keep an IFAK on my belt, on both my PCs, in the closet at home, in my gun bag, and in my car. Today was the first time I ended up using one.
Story time. I’m riding the bench for my teams hockey game tonight due to a leg injury. Beer league, low level, nothing serious. One of our players wears glasses and no cage. He ended up getting hit in the face and his glasses shattered, resulting in some pretty gnarly lacerations. Being the only person not in skates I ran for the rinks first aid supplies, conveniently hidden in a back office and generally inaccessible to the public. Inside: bandaids, tweezers, hand sanitizer, and a single sterile gauze pad. Very useful for a place with people riding around on blades, smacking each other with sticks, and falling on the hardest surface known to man. No TQ, no splint, no brace, no packing gauze, no shears.
I got back to the locker room where they had moved my teammate and they’re trying to stop the bleeding with paper towels from the bathroom. Far from sterile. Fortunately, despite some very nasty cuts (parts hanging off) the bleeding isn’t too bad. So I gave them the single gauze pad and ran to the truck to grab my IFAK. When I returned I realized I was also bleeding (unrelated, cracked hands) so I gloved up and took a look at his face. The bleeding had slowed considerably and everything had been pushed more or less back in place. I wrapped the worst of it with a 4” pressure bandage and drove him off to the ER for stitches, where I am now.
Ultimately, the injuries are minor, and the tools I had on hand weren’t exactly ideal for the situation. But the important thing is they were a damn sight better than what was available at the rink. There was no replacement gauze for the first one once it was removed to check/clean/replace, there was no way to hold a piece of gauze in place or bandage, and there certainly wasn’t anything for a more serious injury. Was the stuff I had or did the things I did save a life? Fuck no, he’ll be fine either way, albeit with a much higher risk of infection and maybe an uglier scare. It was ultimately minor but it was a good reminder to keep your medical supplies with you everywhere, you never know when you might need them.

We are Azure Infinitum
Visit us at: (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/)
You may have seen us in the Aether data center's party finder during our weekly events, or may have seen our recruitment shouts around the realm in-game in Midgardsormr, but there just isn't enough space in those places to really explain everything wonderful about what our Free Company and community is.
Azure Infinitum is an LGBTQ+ friendly community, and welcomes players of all experience level, play style, and availability. We're a warm home with a balance of online players, weekly optional activities, and flexible ranks from our membership, to our support & leadership categories. We have a 24/7 Support Team, a Councilship that governs each tier, seasonal events of our own, and many resources between the games we support and online services.
Who We Are
We are an established 9-year old community who's home is in Midgardsormr Server of Final Fantasy XIV. We are a structured, well-rounded, welcoming, friendly, and organized community that hosts daily events (check out our calendar: https://azureinfinitum.com/events/ ) that provide opportunity for members to excel. We work to provide an arena and opportunities to establish strong bonds and camaraderie between our members. As a community we are driven, we carry each other forward, and we are proud.
Our Name & Philosophy
Learn more about our global community here: (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/aboutus/)
Learn more about our FFXIV Free Company here: (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/ourffxivfc/)
Azure Infinitum means "Azure/Blue Infinity or Infinite Blue/Azure" and there is some mythos behind the name that stems from our guild-wide philosophy of kindness, freedom, vigilance, diversity and activity. We promote positive fellowship among members in an organized guild, with our sights open to our unending endless skies, full of possibility and success together.
Our motto is "As Free As The Azure Sky!" which stuck well when our FC was restructured from an old guild in 2014 as Azure was founded, and it was first shouted as we looked out at a clear blue sky above. has continued to be our electric victory as we continue to snowball in success and activity, our members soaring high through the Azure Sky, flying together!
Ranks
Click here to learn more about our community ranks: (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/ranks/)
Our community has an organized ranking structure beginning with Members who comprise the majority of the roster. Scouts are our support team of Members who've stepped up to more officially support the FC, some work on obtaining a future leadership rank. Lieutenants and Officers comprise the proud Azure Council, a diverse group of players of different specialties and services to the FC, making up lower and higher tier leadership, seeing over the Scouts and the FC weekly events, aside from being admins. The FC Infinitum Master oversees all and leads the Azure Council and the company forward while always keeping the heart and vision of the community alive and in sight. Currently we are re-assessing ranks in the free company, giving more support permissions and duties to our Scouts, while the current council operates as a small team of Lieutenants lead by the FC Master.
Everyone Welcome and Who Fits Best
We have an open door policy. Whether you're casual, a returning player, a veteran, or a newbie, we have a vast array of players in our member roster. Our weekly schedule is organized and provides an array of activity for players of most levels, however we like to ask players who're pretty new or under the level cap, to be extra vocal about their needs while they're still unable to attend some daily events or higher level content that most of our weekly lineup focuses on. We want everyone to have as much fun as possible and have the most success. We find that most players enjoy Azure Infinitum, many have stated that they subscribed to FFXIV much longer than they ever would have imagined after they have been around in our community, as they've gotten involved and experienced all that we offer.
Our FC keeps a daily schedule (see here: https://www.azureinfinitum.com/events/) of events that are hosted by permitted Scouts and Council ranks, these range from 8-man and 24-man raids and map parties, to WT journal groups and trial clear parties or farms, and more- and attending anything isn't mandatory at all here. We're happy to have you, and its up to our members how much they'd like to get involved. Attendance is optional! There's never any stress to attend FC functions.
Savage Raiding Statement
We find that some hardcore raiders looking for free companies just to join their statics who don't already have one, might not fit well if savage raiding is their only or greatest focus, because traditionally Azure does not have a Savage Static, but focuses more on allowing members to organize their own groups and also provides resources to do so. Despite not supporting an official static for the FC, we hope that hardcore raiders enjoy the wealth of our community's wealth of harmony and overall fun, and that everyone may take initiative to seek out or build a raiding static within our community if they are interested, as opposed to missing out on experiencing Azure. Depending on the content season, we may have an Unofficial static lead by a leader, and routinely offer limited time Savage-learning events that may run for a number of months.
Rules and No Drama Policy
Please take a moment to look over our Rules Page at (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/rules/), we find that rude individuals and people who create drama are the outsiders here that don't fit well. We know its a big page, so at least visit the General Rules section before joining.
Recruitment Care & Activity
People of Azure Infinitum are often if not always good natured players who found their way to our community looking for a place with structure, friendliness, organization, and great activity, or they've been scouted during recruitment drives and have been well screened. Its a place where one can be social and attend everything, or relax in the background and enjoy the services and facilities of being in an active, organized, and friendly FC. We actively recruit periodically to assist with upkeep of community activity levels, and to meet new comrades. A community that closes recruitment can be doomed to stagnation. Its normal for a community to have an inner core of die hards who log in daily regardless of content releases, and also have an outer core of individuals that range from those with less availability to those who check in during Patches. This is why we take extra care in keeping the fresh blood flowing into Azure, cautious recruitment, and support our active model by always staying welcoming and sometimes running recruitment campaigns and other services. Like this ad!
Handling Online Drama
Because we keep a no-drama policy and have a strong communication network, it is leadership's ultimate priority to handle any issues that may come up as soon as possible, and most people appreciate our problem solving which has inspired many other communities. Between our Support & Leadership ranks, we use a number of report and resource channels to handle situations, and perform problem solving protocols & tactics to fairly address issues as possible. Drama is inevitable at some point for any online community, so its important to have a large and strong list of moderators (currently around 60!) and a council of leaders (15+) to quickly handle any problems. Luckily, we don't have a lot of drama, but we're always very well equipped and very prepared. Our community has been commended by game staff in the past for our methods, and we have worked with the FFXIV Special Task Force to ensure as much safety to our community as achievable. It should be stressed that it is up to our membership to report to GM's in-game, and to Azure Leadership should any issues or concerns come up. Its also highly recommended that our members appropriately document evidence that can be used to help us assess situations and make proper decisions. Documenation such as screenshots of harassment is a great example! Our members online safety is greatly important to us and is a number one concern of our leadership team. Our Rules Page at: (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/rules/) describes a bit more in Chapter 3, including other entries on avoiding/ignoring trolls, playing while intoxicated, depression, and more.
Our Philosophy
We believe in our community and its people, how far we can go, how much we can do for each other, being an experienced community who's core values are positive fellowship, formation of bonds, and indomitable unity.
Azure Infinitum tightly grasps success and masters a casual and lucrative weekly play schedule while inspiring motivation and providing avenues for further success, friendships, and camaraderie among all who freely fly together among our Azure skies.
Founding on the principles of intricately forging a generally drama-free experience with keen leadership and a zealous and mighty membership, Azure has striven to guide and support many hundreds of players through every era of Final Fantasy XIV.
With an illustrious history, company lore, impressive statistics, and a model that is adaptable and blessed with innovative ability, Azure Infinitum claims a dominant presence of excellence and player growth that is possible in our community and extended services.
Estate Organization
We have the entire set-up at our estate, from gardens for members and Krakka Root production (free for members' chocobos), to our stables, nicely uniform clean lawn with hangout spots that are popular, with crafting stations, all available NPCs for simple mats and repairs, cut-scene viewer, toybox, triple-triad board, a fully operational and geared fleet of airships and subs, and our Azure Infinitum Assembly Chamber on the top floor for our meetings where announcements are made at our Grand Assemblies. Check it out if you like at Mist Ward 7 Plot 1.
We also have an organized form of gathering for weekly events in the yard, places to relax, food that is always available on tables at our Cellar, and hold a lot of special events and social games at our Hall. We're also conveniently located next to a Market Board and a Retainer Bell outside of our estate.
Communication and Extended Azure Services
We have multiple services of which none are mandatory, but we provide being (azureinfinitum.com) where our Forums, Event Calendar, News, Company Meeting Summaries, Seasonal Merch Giveaways, Contests, Rules Page, and more take place and can be found. We also have a popular and active Discord Server.
We also have a Facebook Group, Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, Steam Group, (Look us up! Or visit: (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/socialmedia/) and Linkshells like our Infinitum Alliance LS for contact and aid from our allies if needed, our Azure Hunters LS for Hunters, and our Azure Industry LS which connects our members to our inner crafting/gathering community for newbies to pros.
Also worthy of mention is our big Company Meetings in-game, known as Azure Infinitum Grand Assemblies. Even though we have several avenues that keep people connected, our live assemblies gather the FC in unity where announcements are made first, and all proposals, ideas, and more, can be decided together live with the Azure Council present.
This network ensures a lot of information and communication gets around and has been exceedingly useful to us.
More On Events
One part of our reputation that often precedes us is our event crafting and hosting.
First, let me make sure its clear that attendance is never mandatory, but those who can make use, when possible, of what we provide each day, benefit from our events each week.
Since our beginning, traditions like our Thursday Treasure Thursdays events have run each week. Our weekly line-up presently begins on Tuesdays post-weekly reset, and consists of Raid Tuesdays, Wondrous Wednesdays (WT Journal Parties, often doubles as Trial Clears and Pony Drops), Treasure Thursdays (Endwalker's timeworn maps with groups of 8 doing up to 3 rounds of maps allowing for up to 24 maps ran), 24-Man Tuesdays (full pre-formed Azure 24-member alliances are made and raids are cleared, will be returning upon the release of EW's 24-man), Super Azure Slayer Sunday (our weekly meetup to do all sorts of PVP content be it Rival Wings or Frontline), and Monstrous Mondays (helps clear the current and previous patch extreme trials).
Special, Seasonal, and Quarterly Events
More info here: (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/azureday/)See the latest event news & more at: (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/news/)
We also have what we call Special and Quarterly Events. These types of events are Weekend-Long-Events that usually consist of a theme or celebratory social events we craft. During these events we hold big Riddle Races, Costume/Glamour shows and contests, 3-Story Mansion Maze Races, Speedrun Dungeon Races, Hide and Seek games, Custom Quest Events, Discord events like Cards Against Humanity nights, Comedy events, PVP Tournament Circuits, and more.
Our Special and Quarterly events are Azure Day Weekend (Takes place 3 times a year across a weekend, celebrates the FC), Azure Summer Festival (3-days at the end of August in partnership with Child's Play, raises money for children in long-term care, anniversary of historic FC event called the Lunar Rebellion), Anniversary Azure Day (a big weekend event in November that celebrates our Founding), Azure Day Saint's Wake (celebrates Halloween/All Saint's Wake), Azure Starlight Day (celebrating Starlight Day/Christmas/December Holiday Season), Azure Grand Melee and Duel Tournaments (PVP Circuit series crowning our PVP Champions) and more.
Azure Day Weekends
If you've been around our server you may have heard of our Azure Day Weekends. Our Azure Days take place quarterly as mentioned just above, with four evolved editions called Azure Summer Festival, Azure Day Saint's Wake, Azure Starlight Day, and Anniversary Azure Day. With Azure Day Weekends and related events traditionally occuring quarterly our members are always excited to see the next big weekend of crazy and fun social games, and our showering of the free company in gil and prizes galore. We go all out when we celebrate the free company, and Azure Days are another way we find for leadership to give back to the community. 2023 and beyond is now host to additional seasonal Azure Day events!
We're always giving our members a chance to have fun, win big, and make some great memories in the in-game family we've become. Something fun is always on the horizon in Azure.
Community
I almost can't stress enough how friendly our community is. We have a vast variety of members from hardcore gatherers and crafters, social butterflies, chill veterans, experienced raiders, level grinders, support teams, PVP aficionados, mechanic specialists, and mentors. We're also very friendly to all casual players as well and we keep an open door so long as recruits are always aware that we have a no-drama tolerance here.
​Evolution into a Gaming Clan & Network
Plans are in the works and foundations are being laid that is slowly turning our community into a larger gaming network, with our first established Azure Wing with regular occurring activity being founded in Monster Hunter World, this has led to a successful Destiny 2 clan and more. Becoming a member of our Discord and/or Free Company now means access to things like our huge discord, Azure Wing membership in other games, and being able to join in on any of our other activities in the general community. Azure Network as its being called at the moment, is growing with an all-new website and community features for playing together across Final Fantasy XIV and to Azure Skies beyond!
Activity
We rank high as one of the top FC's in Worldwide Activity on lodestone, and have for a long time. Most of our players are divided between the US East and West Coasts, members in East and West Canada, and a few outside the US or in EU or Aus zones. Because we do have an activity policy (mentioned below) we keep a standard flow of people, and have crowds in the early morning, late morning, early afternoon, afternoon, evening, and late night crowds.
Elitism isn't our style. Our community boasts a broad range of characters, great personalities, the proud, and also some silly goofs. But elitism isn't welcome, no matter how successful we are or how large we grow. We're always welcoming towards fresh faces interested in joining our guild, and the in-game activity ranges between 30-60+ online at once during prime time hours, sometimes around 70+ on patch days, and usually always with half the roster logging in throughout a 24 hour period, and around 15-30+ during the night.
Activity Policy
We ask that our members do not go missing without logging in for more than 60 days straight. If we hear word from someone or have some kind of decent excuse, we place our members on our On Vacation rank, which lasts presently until 90 days have passed. Exceptions are made for military deployments, hospital stays, financial issues, disability/health related issues, moving, or other reasons that might fall on a case-by-case basis.
All members not heard from in 60 days (roughly 2 months) or currently 90 days (roughly 3 months) are discharged. We allow 3 joins to Azure Infinitum in total, but exceptions can be made due to reasons listed above. If removed for inactivity, or you've left our FC for another reason and haven't already joined 3 times, you're always welcome back, but please remember, we are not a revolving door.
Keeping our roster full of members who have been online and presently play the game actively ensures an active environment for our players who play often. It also keeps our credits and clerical processes balanced across our network, and allows space for new faces to join our big happy in-game family of comrades.
How to Join
Quick Instructions here for joinin us in FFXIV & more: (https://www.azureinfinitum.com/howtojoinazure/)
If you are interested in joining our Azure Infinitum free company, please register an application at our site and/or FC in-game. You can also seek any of our Scouts, Lieutenants, Officers, or the Master of Azure Infinitum in-game and ask for an invite. You can find their names on the roster page at our website.
If you read everything on this page, you are awesome, and you should let anyone you talk to who recruits you know that you read everything on this page which will greatly expedite your invitation to join.
If you have any questions whatsoever feel free to send a /tell in-game to me or any of our Scouts or Lieutenants listed on our official roster here: https://na.finalfantasyxiv.com/lodestone/freecompany/9232519973597911137/membe
You can also message us at our FB Page: https://www.facebook.com/AzureInfinitum
Discord here: https://discord.gg/azureinfinitum
Twitter: https://twitter.com/azureinfinitum
Insta: https://www.instagram.com/azure_infinitum/
Main Site: https://www.azureinfinitum.com/

Quite honestly, I am worried about the reductive responses I may receive (albeit well-intentioned), based on past experiences with people who think I do not understand my own intersectional context well. Please keep an open mind and an empathetic heart if you choose to respond.
I have struggled with mental illness for most of my life. While I began navigating the earlier diagnoses of bipolar disorder and anxiety more clearly, I realized a few months ago that my most recent diagnosis of OCD was the one that has affected me the most in my life. It first manifested as religious and moralistic OCD when I was 8 years old. I would have visceral paranoia about the Day of Judgment, everything ending, and my loved ones all leaving me. I would distance myself from my family, and get frustrated with my parents because I kept imagining them dying and abandoning me. Similar to how a parasite evolves to live undetected in its host, the intrusive thoughts would change form, so once I thought I had resolved them they would evolve to more effectively keep me mentally paralyzed in fear. Every Ramadan I would cry nonstop when I would attend Taraweeh, because I saw how all the adults would cry about their sins and fear death. I would seek constant reassurance from my mom any time my friends talked about boys or anything remotely “sinful”. It didn’t matter if I actually did anything or not, because anything that could be a sin needed to be repented for through confession.
Years later, as I have sinned more and my relationship with religion has fluctuated (never disappeared) as I came to understand the world around me from various points of view, I now feel lost because Islam seems to be fundamentally at war with Western society. Western imperialism from the beginning was created in opposition to the Islamic empire, and so it is only natural that these parts of my cultural identity are constantly in turmoil today. We are not separate from our history.
This Ramadan, I am now trying to get back into religion by listening to scholars, but it’s really, really hard. Particularly when those scholars (mostly men) try to separate themselves from societal context by acting as if they are God’s representatives, which was incredibly problematic in the Catholic rhetoric that had promoted European colonialism for hundreds of years. I wish I could feel at peace when I dig deeper to find “the truth”, but so far these sources seem to want to disrupt my other “western-derived” leftist beliefs that I have formed after years of navigating my OCD trauma, as well as studying the direct context that I have been placed in. Although I can align some of my beliefs and values on my own that I think are both Islamic and leftist, it’s difficult because both societies are telling me that I’m wrong for challenging each structure, and for trying to force a convergence.
I feel incredibly lost and alone, because I’m too Muslim to be American and too American to be Muslim. Everyone is so confident by remaining at a superficial level, without ever trying to dig deeper. And if someone does try to dig deeper, it’s better that they leave if they don’t blindly accept. Blind faith and adherence is more important than attempting to gain intimate understanding. I wish I could enjoy Ramadan like everyone else, and I am grateful that I am given so many opportunities, but it’s always been an emotionally charged month for me, and maybe that’s something I just have to accept and go through alone

On January 19, my (26f) dad (62) came over to help me hang my tv. He called me after with a heavy slur and telling me he was having a really hard time talking. I called my mom who took him to the ER, feeling pretty confident he just had a mini stroke. All signs pointed to a mini stroke. I so badly. so. badly. wish it was a mini stroke.
They did an MRI, then a contrast MRI, then a CT. They sent him home after a day saying that his symptoms say a stroke but his scans say otherwise. They scheduled some more tests and set him up with a neuro-oncologist for over a month out.
It became a waiting game. His speech would go in and out, some days he was fine, other days he sounded like he was drunk. My dad was convinced it was nothing and he was fine but we all knew it was going to be something.
After his appointment with the neuro oncologist, she said this was a case unlike she’s ever seen and she brought it to the state board for review. A brain biopsy was scheduled to find out more.
March 15th, we finally had answers. Stage 4 glioblastoma. A fast moving, aggressive brain tumor that creates legions and spreads rapidly. Typically treatment entails removing as much of these lesions as possible and doing radiation/chemo to slow the growth, but it will never fully go. Most people make it 12-18 months most with the treatment, and that’s if the tumor responds, which it often doesn’t. The physicians assistant giving these results sounded more positive than what was probably truthful. “We treat this all the time,” she said, “he’s in good hands and his symptoms will be mild with this type of radiation and chemo.
By the time we finally got these answers, his speech was slurry more often than not and he was losing his ability to use his right hand. They scheduled radiation and chemo to begin April 4. Three more weeks of regressing before treatment starts. Three fucking weeks.
My parents decided to get a second opinion at a brain cancer specialty clinic, praying they might have more answers or other treatment options. The neurologist here finally gave some honesty. He told us to enjoy as much time as we can with him. Do all the things he enjoys and take in every moment. He said to get our affairs in order. He said to just be present and love. He said this all through tears, unable to promise a time frame.
Earlier my dad fell when taking out the recycling. He wasn’t able to move his right leg. He was at the house alone, stuck for some time before he could get back inside. He said he was trying to write a message in the rocks because he thought that would be it. Thankfully it wasn’t.
Tonight, he made the decision that he no longer wants to do treatment. He doesn’t want to deal with burns on his scalp and the nausea and exhaustion. He doesn’t want more time if his time is left with half of his body working. He wants to ride out the time he has.
With no treatment, they said most people make it 4-6 months from the first sight of symptoms. We are in month 2 and he has already declined so so much. 2 months ago he was hanging a tv. Playing golf. Hosting parties. Today he can hardly walk.
I am so angry and so sad and feel so hopeless right now. If these doctors knew so early that this was something serious, why the fuck has it taken this long? Why the fuck are we just learning the reality? Why would they schedule radiation 3 weeks out after watching the lesions go from 4cm to 26 in 4 weeks? Why is this happening to my dad? How am I supposed to cope with the fact that I have no idea how much time I have left with him, not to mention how much time it will actually BE him.
My dad will probably not see me get my masters degree in two months. Or pass my boards. Or meet the person I fall in love with. Or walk me down the isle. He won’t meet his future grandkids.
He won’t be there to answer my dumb questions about what tools to use to fix my breaking furniture. He won’t be there with his truck to help me move. He won’t be there to tell me what the sounds my car makes means. He won’t be there to give me hugs and tell me he’s proud of me and make me breakfast when I’m sick. I just bought that online storytelling guide that puts all of his memories into a book at the end of the year. But it’s pointless because he won’t even be here by the end of the year, or even the summer.
I need to get this out because I’m not good at taking the love from the people that care about me even though I have so many that do. I have no idea how to let them love me. I’ve only told maybe 6 people, one of which was my boss. I feel like crawling out of my skin and running away when I’m faced with talking about it. I am devastated and lost as I try to prepare for a world without the man who gave me unconditional love my whole life. The only who ran out of the hospital room when I was born right after I was clean, before my mom even got to hold me. and my mom… how is she supposed to go another 20 years without her person? How is she supposed to live in her home alone when 3 months ago they were traveling and living their best lives together?
I hate what the universe has given to my family. I have no ability to be excited for any of my or my family’s upcoming milestones because I feel hallow and powerless and lonely. So, all I can do is share all of this here, to a group of strangers so I don’t have to make my reality aware of how fucking angry and sad and hopeless I really am.

I want to start by saying I love and care for my boyfriend deeply. He was my first love and first everything. I was 16 when we first started dating. From the beginning of our relationship, we had problems. For about a year he lied about talking to girls he said he blocked, his Reddit account, and he just treated me terribly. I dealt with it hoping he would change. After I found out about all of that we broke up for about two months. Eventually, we got back together and he honestly did do better. He started to actually love me and treat me right. However, we still fought a ton. I couldn't forgive him fully for lying to my face for a year. I held resentment and hatred. In December 2021 he developed an alcohol problem and tossed me aside. He wouldn't even touch me or be there for me mentally. I was nothing to him. I finally was at my last straw in October of 2022 and informed him he needed help and that I wouldn't be with him until he does. Around a week later I met a guy at work. I thought he was handsome but didn't think anything else. Let's call him big boy. Big boy and I hit it off immediately. He made me feel special and confident like I was worth more than I ever thought I could be. We talked for months and I loved every minute of it. I cut off our friendship to be with my boyfriend. His drinking problem did get better and I'm happy he did. After 3 months of not talking to a big boy, I miss him every day. I'm scared to cut off my current relationship because he's all I know.
TLDR: Scared to leave boyfriend of five year but I am in love with someone else.

On January 19, my (26f) dad (62) came over to help me hang my tv. He called me after with a heavy slur and telling me he was having a really hard time talking. I called my mom who took him to the ER, feeling pretty confident he just had a mini stroke. All signs pointed to a mini stroke. I so badly. so. badly. wish it was a mini stroke.
They did an MRI, then a contrast MRI, then a CT. They sent him home after a day saying that his symptoms say a stroke but his scans say otherwise. They scheduled some more tests and set him up with a neuro-oncologist for over a month out.
It became a waiting game. His speech would go in and out, some days he was fine, other days he sounded like he was drunk. My dad was convinced it was nothing and he was fine but we all knew it was going to be something.
After his appointment with the neuro oncologist, she said this was a case unlike she’s ever seen and she brought it to the state board for review. A brain biopsy was scheduled to find out more.
March 15th, we finally had answers. Stage 4 glioblastoma. A fast moving, aggressive brain tumor that creates legions and spreads rapidly. Typically treatment entails removing as much of these lesions as possible and doing radiation/chemo to slow the growth, but it will never fully go. Most people make it 12-18 months most with the treatment, and that’s if the tumor responds, which it often doesn’t. The physicians assistant giving these results sounded more positive than what was probably truthful. “We treat this all the time,” she said, “he’s in good hands and his symptoms will be mild with this type of radiation and chemo.
By the time we finally got these answers, his speech was slurry more often than not and he was losing his ability to use his right hand. They scheduled radiation and chemo to begin April 4. Three more weeks of regressing before treatment starts. Three fucking weeks.
My parents decided to get a second opinion at a brain cancer specialty clinic, praying they might have more answers or other treatment options. The neurologist here finally gave some honesty. He told us to enjoy as much time as we can with him. Do all the things he enjoys and take in every moment. He said to get our affairs in order. He said to just be present and love. He said this all through tears, unable to promise a time frame.
Earlier my dad fell when taking out the recycling. He wasn’t able to move his right leg. He was at the house alone, stuck for some time before he could get back inside. He said he was trying to write a message in the rocks because he thought that would be it. Thankfully it wasn’t.
Tonight, he made the decision that he no longer wants to do treatment. He doesn’t want to deal with burns on his scalp and the nausea and exhaustion. He doesn’t want more time if his time is left with half of his body working. He wants to ride out the time he has.
With no treatment, they said most people make it 4-6 months from the first sight of symptoms. We are in month 2 and he has already declined so so much. 2 months ago he was hanging a tv. Playing golf. Hosting parties. Today he can hardly walk.
I am so angry and so sad and feel so hopeless right now. If these doctors knew so early that this was something serious, why the fuck has it taken this long? Why the fuck are we just learning the reality? Why would they schedule radiation 3 weeks out after watching the lesions go from 4cm to 26 in 4 weeks? Why is this happening to my dad? How am I supposed to cope with the fact that I have no idea how much time I have left with him, not to mention how much time it will actually BE him.
My dad will probably not see me get my masters degree in two months. Or pass my boards. Or meet the person I fall in love with. Or walk me down the isle. He won’t meet his future grandkids.
He won’t be there to answer my dumb questions about what tools to use to fix my breaking furniture. He won’t be there with his truck to help me move. He won’t be there to tell me what the sounds my car makes means. He won’t be there to give me hugs and tell me he’s proud of me and make me breakfast when I’m sick. I just bought that online storytelling guide that puts all of his memories into a book at the end of the year. But it’s pointless because he won’t even be here by the end of the year, or even the summer.
I need to get this out because I’m not good at taking the love from the people that care about me even though I have so many that do. I have no idea how to let them love me. I’ve only told maybe 6 people, one of which was my boss. I feel like crawling out of my skin and running away when I’m faced with talking about it. I am devastated and lost as I try to prepare for a world without the man who gave me unconditional love my whole life. The only who ran out of the hospital room when I was born right after I was clean, before my mom even got to hold me. and my mom… how is she supposed to go another 20 years without her person? How is she supposed to live in her home alone when 3 months ago they were traveling and living their best lives together?
I hate what the universe has given to my family. I have no ability to be excited for any of my or my family’s upcoming milestones because I feel hallow and powerless and lonely. So, all I can do is share all of this here, to a group of strangers so I don’t have to make my reality aware of how fucking angry and sad and hopeless I really am.

I want to start by saying I love and care for my boyfriend deeply. He was my first love and first everything. I was 16 when we first started dating. From the beginning of our relationship, we had problems. For about a year he lied about talking to girls he said he blocked, his Reddit account, and he just treated me terribly. I dealt with it hoping he would change. After I found out about all of that we broke up for about two months. Eventually, we got back together and he honestly did do better. He started to actually love me and treat me right. However, we still fought a ton. I couldn't forgive him fully for lying to my face for a year. I held resentment and hatred. In December 2021 he developed an alcohol problem and tossed me aside. He wouldn't even touch me or be there for me mentally. I was nothing to him. I finally was at my last straw in October of 2022 and informed him he needed help and that I wouldn't be with him until he does. Around a week later I met a guy at work. I thought he was handsome but didn't think anything else. Let's call him big boy. Big boy and I hit it off immediately. He made me feel special and confident like I was worth more than I ever thought I could be. We talked for months and I loved every minute of it. I cut off our friendship to be with my boyfriend. His drinking problem did get better and I'm happy he did. After 3 months of not talking to a big boy, I miss him every day. I'm scared to cut off my current relationship because he's all I know.
TLDR: Scared to leave boyfriend of five year but I am in love with someone else.

Hello all;
I need your funny and creative ideas for “MIL-proof-ing” some moving boxes!
Long story short, JNMIL is making a cross-country drive from her state (our home state) to our state at the end of the month, and I’m back in home state right now for a few more days (with my own jyes family). I’ll be dropping off a few boxes of assorted items belonging to both myself and DH that will sit in her garage for a couple weeks and then make the trip cross-country with her in her vehicle (as I’m flying in and out).
Can anyone think of creative ways that I could pack or seal the boxes that would like make it pretty evident if someone had tried to open and reseal them? kinda like the old "lay a single hair across it" trick; but bonus points for something thats super obvious to her as well😂
It’s a good time to note that these are all very low-stakes items; nothing at all personal or sensitive in nature, so the context of this question is not about actually protecting items, which I think would be a much more serious issue to work through. This is just about me and my fantasy of wanting a few sweet moments of picturing her face when she realizes she can’t open any of the boxes without me knowing. 😂🤣

I need to believe that the world is fair and just for all. I genuinely would rather end it all than admit the world is unfair because then that would mean I would need to accept that the bad things that happen to me are things I didn’t necessarily deserve, and I can’t do that because that would mean people can just choose to wrong me and there’d be nothing I could do about it
My ex, Dan, did things to me without my consent. You know what happened. I truly, honestly would rather believe I deserved this than admit he wronged me, much to my family’s ire. They tell me I need to love myself. I do love myself, and that means owning up to the things that happened to me.
My family desperately wants me to not think this way and they tell me I need help, but I can’t not think this way. I need to, for my own sanity, I need to believe that bad things only ever happen to people when they deserve it.
What do I do?
TL;DR I simply lack the ability to accept that the world isn’t fair and that I deserve the abuse I receive. My family is deeply hurting at this. What do I do?

Most people are mentally and emotionally sane, relatively at least. They might claim that the worry is all in your head, not understanding that your corporeal experience strongly suggests otherwise. They might tell you to think positive, because they don't have an inner voice that constantly gets drowned out by a huge stadium packed with negative objectors. They might take it rather personally when socializing is the very least thing you want to do, they could never imagine that them yapping on about their normal life drains your already depleted life-energy. Some of them might start all kinds of shit with you because they see you as a weak and opportune victim to unload their own shit towards, never realizing they're the real cowards.
Some of them might truly want to help you out and tell you get therapy asap, then you might see some random bureaucrat person completely devoid of empathy struggling to stay awake while you pour you heart of desperately looking for some kind of assistance. Assistance that usually comes in form of dubious drugs that only work at a hefty price by the way So they advice you to go see some private expensive experts, unaware of the fact that your wallets suffers with you. They like to imply that you just chill the out and relax. Because they don't have that intrusive, horrible, horrible, horrible, encompassing, joy-devouring, soul-obliterating, sucking, painful, torturous, uneasy pit of dread stuck right in their stomach with racing thoughts to boot. Perhaps they'll make sly remarks on how you need to just grow up, after all, they don't know how's it's like to think like an adult while emotionally reacting like a little fragile child scared to death.
They might say go the gym or be physically active and get some endorphins running. To be fair, is actually solid advice if you can muster the strength to go there. Off course they have their problems too, the difference however is your problem and is you and how that you contaminate every aspect of your life. The point is, according to some of 'them' you're just a loser, useless, lazy, afraid, a waste of space, a failure with nothing to show for in life. They are so much better than you and intentionally or not they make you buy that miserable story.
However. It's just opinions from people with no experience. I don't want to you to waste any energy on harboring any resentment, envy or anger towards anybody, they just don't understand. How could they know the truth. Perhaps even you don't the truth about yourself, so I'm going to say it, just in case.
You simply being here and keeping on makes you a total badass. A warrior that fights hordes of demons every day. Bravery is defined by the will to face fear, you have fear stuffed in your face all the time. You may suffer endless anxiety, but you as a matter of fact are courageous by the definition of the word. Doing your best to just keep going. It's not some lofty motivational speech, just a cold fact.
It may not help you any bit to read this, but I for one will not let it be unsaid. Anxiety is bad enough in itself, rather than feeling shame in addition you have earned the right to be proud. My intention is for you to keep that in mind on your darkest days, because I know what it's like.

(You can ask any questins if you’d like! The name of the villain is “The snow lord”. This is in the second person, it would narrate the perspective of one the characters, probaly Petra or Lukas, most likely Petra-)
You trudged through the snow, shivering in the freezing wind. You hear the crunch of the ever piling snow under you feet as you kept moving forward. You hoped you were able to find the other three, who you had been separated from ever since you entered this…icy portal. You could barely feel your toes or fingers anymore, parts of your skin had turned red as an apple while you traveled through the snowstorm. You really regret not staying in the cave you were in. Sure, it was still cold, but not as cold as it was outside the cave…
You would continue forward while the wind would howl as it hit you face. You had a bit of trouble breathing, as the wind was blowing in you mouth a bit, you decided to cover you mouth a bit so you could breath. You were trying to conserve the items you had in your inventory, so you were starving…As soon as you get a cave, you were going to eat something…It was so hard to navigate through the snowy tundra…you could barely see in front of you. But then…Something…odd happened…The storm seemed to die down a bit, and you had no idea why. Until you looked over and saw…a man.
He seemed to be wearing dark blue attire, which a hood that prevented you from seeing his face. He had a grey beard, and was a taller then you from what you could tell. He had a light blue glowing eye, and a staff, and from what you could see, you saw a snowflake that was inside the staff, the staff also seemed to be glowing. He also had a icy crown floating above his head, as it would seemly glow as well. You saw that the northern lights were happing behind him. They looked so…extraordinary to see…The light they gave off were just so…stunning and dazzling. You saw that the North Star was there as well, it would shine a tad, but you couldn’t see it all that well due to the fog that was still there. Yet…the man was looking at you the entire time. The staff would start to glow a little more…Then…you soon felt…drowsy…and would soon collapse onto the snow…falling into a state of unconscious…
As you would awake from your slumber, you saw that the man was…gone. Nowhere to be seen, nowhere at all. You would sit up, as you didn’t feel like getting up. You were astonished from the encounter you had…Who was that man? Why was he out here with you? Was he the cause of the worlds snowy look? And where did he even go? Those thoughts would race through you mind as you sat up, and would look at the northern lights. They were so exquisite to look at, you couldn’t take you eyes off them. The North Star was shining bright, it was just as gorgeous as the extravagant northern lights. After a while of just admiring their beauty, you got up and would continue to try and find shelter. You would soon find a new cave you could rest in, as you felt quite exhausted from traveling through that storm and the encounter with the man. As you would lay down and close your eyes, the one thought that would remain in your head was…who even even was that man? And where did he go? It was truly a mystery…